Chapter 14: Stirring Up the Signal
âFutaba-san, is it okay if I punch you?â
âYou seriously think Iâd give you permission for that?â
âIf you did, I could punch you guilt-free.â
âAnd if I donât?â
âThen Iâll punch you, drenched in guilt.â
âSo either way, Iâm getting punched⊠C-Can you at least be gentle?â
âItâs the way you said that! Tsubasa-chanâs gonna get the wrong idea!!â
âOw, ow, a fist hurts! An open handâs no better! Youâre not even holding back anymore, Kishine!â
âWell, thatâs because youâre just the worst!â
We were walking along the dimly lit riverbank. Just the two of us. And of all things, I was stuck with the completely out-of-it Futaba-san.
âŠIf things had gone right, I shouldâve rescued Tsubasa-chan from Futaba-sanâs clutches, and the two of us wouldâve made up by now.
We were finally starting to come together again. Things were going wellâuntil Futaba-san barged in and ruined the moment.
And on top of that⊠she whispered something unthinkable to me. So quietly Tsubasa-chan wouldnât hear. She leaned in close and saidâ
âââHey, wanna make Tsubasa jealous?â
âŠIt was honestly a devilâs temptation.
The moment I heard it, I knew it was a bad idea.
And yet, IâŠ
ââI wanted to understand how Tsubasa-chan really felt. I couldnât resist the urge to test her heart.
Trying to test someoneâs feelings⊠I knew how shameful that was.
But Iâd been so anxious all this time, wondering what Tsubasa-chan really thought of me. So I went along with Futaba-sanâs plan. I conspired with her to do something like this.
Maybe right now, Iâm just a bundle of impure intentions.
âOwâŠâ
âMaybe you should finally learn your lesson.â
With a sigh, I calmed myself a little.
Just how much longer is this miserable two-person trip going to last? Thinking about that made it impossible to feel even the slightest bit cheerful.
ââŠSo? What exactly is this supposed to be?â
âWhat is?â
ââŠYou know. Like, going on a date or something with you.â
I had absolutely zero interest in anything like that, so if she really was trying to go there, I was ready to throw out some biting words and storm off.
With that mindset, I glared at her. Futaba tilted her head in mild confusion.
âKishine only wants my body, right? Nothing else matters to youâŠâ
She said that garbage like it was the most natural thing in the worldâwithout even a hint of shame.
âPervert!â
âBut itâs just that you havenât been able to have sex with Tsubasa for a while, so all that pent-up lust is getting to your brain, right?â
âI never said anything like that! Donât joke around!â
âBut isnât that the real reason youâre all irritable?â
âItâs not!!â
Maybe the mistake was trying to have a conversation with Futaba in the first place. Or maybe the entire premise of this talk was completely messed up.
Why does she think Tsubasa-chan and I are, well⊠in that kind of relationship? And why is she acting like Iâm some constantly horny pervert?
It was all some ridiculous false accusationâcompletely and utterly absurd.
ââŠWhat do you even think is going on between me and Tsubasa-chan?â
âUh, a sexless lesbian couple?â
âShould I just throw her into the river right now?
In the dim light, I glared as fiercely as I could and shouted at this clueless fake-fan girlâshouted with all my heart and soul.
âTsubasa-chan would never do something so dirty!!!â
âOh? Thatâs the part youâre mad about?â
âWhat else would I be mad about!?â
âYouâre a lesbian.â
âI most definitely am not! Do you want me to throw you out!?â
âYou get mad every second, huh?â
âWhose fault do you think that is!!â
ââŠTsubasaâs?â
âItâs you, Futaba-san!!â
Panting furiously, I launched a full protest against this absolute worst sexual harassment offender in existence. Not only was she way off-base, she was also some pervert trying to smear Tsubasa-chan with her twisted fantasies, and I wasnât going to let that happen.
Not that she seemed the least bit fazed.
ââŠHow did it even come to this? What kind of twisted logic led you to that pervy conclusion?â
âHm?â
Realizing reason wouldnât work with her, I decided to change my approach. Even when I thought we were having a real conversation, somehow she always pulled me into her rhythm without me noticing.
But not this time. This time, I wasnât going to let that happen.
âFrom now on, Iâd just completely deny everything Futaba-san said.
If she ever uttered something like âYou and Tsubasa-chan totally seem like youâd have lesbian sex,â Iâd immediately dunk her into the river. I steeled myself with that conviction and faced her directly.
ââŠWait, so if you havenât done it, and youâre still acting like this?â
âHuh?â
For some reason, Futaba-san looked genuinely confused. If anything, she even seemed a little taken aback.
Iâd expected her to start spewing her usual stream of trash, so the unexpected silence kind of caught me off guard.
ââŠWhat are you trying to say?â
âAhaha, um, just⊠wow. This is kinda bad, huh.â
âHuh?â
And to top it off, she was obviously recoiling from me.
I couldnât even make sense of itâand more importantly, I couldnât forgive it.
I mean, sure, if I were the one pulling away from the incoherent mess that is Futaba-san, thatâd be perfectly understandable. But the reverse? That should be illegal in every corner of the universe.
âThis makes no sense.â
I said that clearly, full of irritation. Futaba-san gave me a polite little smile, then started counting on her fingers as she began listing things out.
âKishine cares about Tsubasa more than anyone. When you canât talk to her, you get irritable. You get hurt all on your own because of Tsubasa. You start emotionally self-harming over her. And when someone else even gets close to her, you get so stressed you canât control yourself anymore.â
âThat⊠thatâsââ
The words caught in my throat. Iâd meant to tear apart every last thing she saidâbut I couldnât, because every single word out of her mouth was absolutely true. The fact that she was right stabbed into my chest like a thorn.
âThatâs why I figured, if you two are that emotionally entangled, of course youâre lovers and doing it.â
ââŠShut up.â
I had no comeback.
I couldnât even begin to build a counter-argument.
Becauseâugh, itâs so frustratingâFutaba-san wasnât wrong.
âŠUgh. I hate logic. Especially when sheâs the one using it.
âBut even so, I still donât think it adds up.â
After pinning me down with all that, she still had the gall to cock her head like she was puzzledâlike she still believed there was a high probability that Tsubasa-chan and I were doing indecent things.
âŠI really donât get her.
âWhat more do you want? âŠJust stop saying weird stuff already.â
âOkay. But since this isnât weird stuff, Iâm going to say it anyway.â
Leaning in closer to my face on purpose, Futaba-san gave me an obnoxiously smug smile.
ââWhat Iâm saying is, itâs not a one-sided crush on your part, so itâs hard for me to accept this whole âdenialâ thing.â
And then, just like that, she said something that totally threw my heart off balance.
ââŠWhat do you mean by that?â
âYouâre being so roundabout.â
She gave a little sigh, like she was exasperated, but still clearly enjoying herself. Then, after a brief pause, she said it.
ââIt means Tsubasa cares deeply about you, too.â
She said it so simplyâexactly the answer Iâd been secretly wanting. Like she knew it all along.
ââŠYou canât know that.â
âSo you donât believe in Tsubasaâs love, huh, Kishine?â
ââLoveâ⊠You can only say that because youâre making fun of it.â
Futaba-sanâs words wrapped themselves around me.
I kept thinking she was just teasing me, trying to string me alongâand yet, I couldnât bring myself to shut the conversation down.
âNo, Iâm not. Iâm on Tsubasaâs side.â
Futaba-san said that with this weird sense of confidence. It was annoyingâbut frustratingly, I couldnât bring myself to deny it.
ââŠWhy?â
âTsubasa was waiting for you on the rooftop the whole time.â
ââŠI know.â
Our conversation dragged on like something tangled, impossible to cleanly pull apart.
âRight? You saw her there, waiting and waiting, didnât you? Because you were watching the whole timeâsince youâre Tsubasaâs stalker.â
ââŠI donât know what youâre talking about.â
Even when the truth was pointed out, I could only clumsily dodge it without properly covering it up.
âHey, have you noticed? Tsubasa is pretty blunt with me, but she always speaks kindly to Kishine.â
ââââ
I had tried to harden my heart and deflect it, but even though it was formed only out of fragile hope, it landed a direct hit on my heart.
Just the simple fact that I seemed to be treated more gently than Futaba-san was enough to shake me strangely deep inside.
ââŠMaybe itâs just a matter of perspective, and thereâs barely any real difference at all.â
And yet, I swung around that excuse like a shield, unable to let go of the resentment smoldering at the bottom of my heart.
So I wouldnât expect too much. So I wouldnât get too happy⊠so that, when the truth came outâI wouldnât be disappointed.
âWell then, tomorrow when we get our answer should be fun to watch, huhâȘâ
As if mocking my conflicted heart, Futaba-san grinned from ear to ear. Like a kid looking forward to a field trip.
âFun to watchâŠ?â
What was she even talking about?
Did anything Futaba-san said ever have any meaning in the first place?
She deliberately pressed a finger to her lips and let out a deliberately sultry laugh, âUfufu.â
âI told you, right? That I was gonna try and make Tsubasa jealous.â
ââŠYou did say that, butâŠâ
âŠCould that be why she suddenly kissed me like that earlier?
If thatâs the case, then her plan was way too naive.
Tsubasa-chan wouldnât get worked up over someone like me⊠no way.
âThereâs no wayâŠâ
âThere is, you know.â
Futaba-san and I were never in sync.
Our opinions never, not even once, aligned.
âŠBut now.
âWanna make a bet? On what Tsubasa does tomorrow. Whether she clings to Kishine or not.â
âAnd what happens if we bet?â
âIf I win, I want to be friends with Tsubasa. Youâll accept that, right, Kishine?â
âAnd if you lose?â
âHmm, letâs see. Iâll stop messing with Tsubasa. Howâs that?â
âŠIt was obviously a bet skewed in my favor.
Because even if I lost, I had virtually nothing to lose.
ââŠFine.â
So I agreed.
Futaba-san had skillfully stirred me up, and I ended up letting myself hopeâusing the bet as an excuseâthat Tsubasa-chan might actually pay attention to me.
âHehe, itâs a promise, Kishine!â
With that, what had felt like a long two-person journey with Futaba-san suddenly came to an end.
Because she spun on her heel and turned her back to me.
âŠProbably because sheâd already said everything she wanted to say.
âSee ya, Kishine!â
So carefree, and completely selfish.
But somehow, a person who puts in effort.
Someone who could try so hard⊠for Tsubasa-chanâs sake.
ââŠBye-bye, Futaba-san.â
I wonder whoâll win the bet tomorrow.
Ifâif I ended up losing the betâŠ
I felt like⊠maybe I could accept Futaba-san. Just a little bit.
And then, that morning, as I headed to school feeling restlessâŠ
âOh, mornââing, KishiâŠâ
It wasnât the usual time. Tsubasa-chan had arrived before me.
She didnât meet my eyes, but still came close and quietly, shyly greeted meâsuch a cute Tsubasa-chan.
That alone made me happy, but more than that, what truly surprised me wasâŠ
âTsubasa-chan⊠you said my nameâŠâ
A soft warmth bloomed inside my chest.
The result had come faster than I ever expected.
Tsubasa-chan had called me by my name.
Just that one thing made the whole world feel like it had turned dazzling and bright.
I lost the bet.
Tsubasa-chan⊠got jealous for me.
âŠMy heartâs pounding.
Before I knew it, something indescribable had overflowed inside my chest.
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