Tsuitsui

By: Tsuitsui

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Chapter 106: Birthday (Part 4)

After getting out of the bath, I went back to my room.

Yuna came along too, for no particular reason, and lay down on my bed reading manga.

While copying today’s notes that Yuna had brought me, I passed the time asking her questions whenever I hit a part I didn’t understand.

When there’s something I have to do, it keeps my mind from wandering.

And more than anything, having Yuna around helped keep the loneliness away, which I was grateful for.

Dinner was homemade hamburg steak with demi-glace sauce, made by Mom.

Her kindness came through clearly—trying to cheer me up with my favorite food—but I didn’t have much appetite and ended up leaving about half of it.

When I apologized, Mom gently patted my head and told me not to worry about it. Dad finished off what I’d left.

The conversation during dinner felt awkward somehow.

Dad, Mom, Yuna, and me. There were four of us at the table, yet it didn’t feel like the whole family was there. That probably meant Alicia had truly been accepted as part of our family.

Remembering the times we’d all sat together, including Alicia, that sense of family… it made me feel painfully lonely.

That’s when it happened.

I felt something heavy and wet trickle down from my lower abdomen—my period had started.

I told my family, then quickly excused myself from the living room. After finishing my bedtime preparations, I retreated to my room.

My stomach hurt. My body felt heavy.

As soon as I stepped into my room, I collapsed onto my bed.

Curled up under the covers, holding my cramping stomach with both hands, I lay there.

On a day like this, I just wanted to fall asleep quickly. But no matter how long I waited, sleep didn’t come.

It wasn’t surprising. I’d napped so much during the day.

But lying alone in the dark, I couldn’t stop my thoughts from spiraling. Maybe because I wasn’t feeling well, only bad thoughts came to mind.

"...Did I do something to upset Alicia?"

What if, without realizing it, I’d hurt her, or made her angry? What if she’d cut the connection with me as a way to protest?

...But honestly, I didn’t think that was likely.

Even if Alicia was angry, it was hard to imagine her using such a worrying method to express it. Besides, she’d been genuinely looking forward to today’s birthday party...

If, by some chance, I had done something wrong and that’s why Alicia wasn’t showing up, then I’d apologize as many times as it took until she forgave me.

More importantly...

"Maybe something’s happened to Alicia... and she’s still suffering right now?"

That thought scared me most.

With the link severed, I couldn’t hear Alicia’s voice, and she couldn’t hear mine.

So even if she was hurting somewhere, there was nothing I could do—not even know that she was suffering.

I closed my eyes, focusing on the presence of Alicia inside me.

Somewhere near my heart, I could sense something faintly warm, softly glowing—that feeling, I knew instinctively, was Alicia.

...But that was all I could tell.

Was Alicia suffering?

Was she in pain?

『Alicia...』

No matter how many times I called to her with thought-speak, no reply ever came.

"If... Alicia never comes back..."

That ominous thought slipped out before I could stop it, and I hastily shook my head.

"No way... that’s not possible..."

Maybe she was mad about what happened with Yuna in the bath earlier?

But... she was just washing me, that’s all... right? That should be fine... probably.

Besides, Alicia had always been oddly supportive when it came to me being physically close with Yuna or Hisui.

"...Huh?"

I suddenly felt something off about my own thoughts.

During our journey together, I’d faced a lot of temptation—villages welcoming me as a Hero, people wanting to connect their bloodline to mine, things like that. But I’d been able to reject all of it thanks to Alicia.

She never directly scolded me, but whenever I got too close to another girl, she’d sulk and get in a bad mood. That was just how she was.

So... it didn’t make sense.

It didn’t make sense that Alicia, who used to get so easily jealous, would now quietly accept me being intimate with Hisui too, not just Yuna.

Until now, I’d thought maybe that was her way of compensating—since she couldn’t physically be with me anymore.

...But.

If Alicia had started accepting my closeness with other girls because she knew she was going to disappear…

“…That’s ridiculous.”

I shook my head, rejecting the thought.

Some part of me felt that explanation made sense… but there was no way I could ever accept it.

A dull throbbing pain echoed deep in my skull.

Was it the period causing this headache? Or my anxiety? Or both?

“I don’t want to say goodbye like this, Alicia…”

My body felt cold. Tonight felt especially chilly.

I hugged myself tightly.


February 10th (Friday)

“—!!?”

I shot up in bed, jolted awake from a nightmare.

My heart was pounding violently, and my entire body was soaked with unpleasant sweat.

“Alicia…”

Collapsing back onto the bed, I pressed both hands against my chest.

“Alicia is here… she’s still here…”

Relief washed over me as I realized the nightmare wasn’t real. But right after, the familiar disappointment struck—Alicia still hadn’t come back.

“Again, huh…”

How many times had this happened now?

Even when I tried to sleep so Alicia could return, the cramps and the anxiety-induced restlessness kept me awake. And even when exhaustion finally dragged me into unconsciousness, I’d be woken again by another nightmare.

I’d been trapped in that cycle all night.

“Ugh… this is the worst…”

I felt something damp between my legs. Looking down, I saw that the crotch of my pajama pants was stained. Blood from my period had leaked through.

Sitting up to check, I saw that, thankfully, the sheets had been spared.

“…I need to clean up…”

My body felt like lead as I dragged myself out of bed. Still half-dazed, I prepared clean clothes, then dragged my heavy body toward the bathroom.

Inside the bath area, I peeled off the bloodstained pajama pants.

My underwear was soaked too. The pad had completely overflowed, leaving it heavy and unpleasant.

Hooking my fingers under the waistband of my panties, I pulled them down in one go.

“Ugh…”

I let out a sound without thinking, overwhelmed by the mess before me—everything stained dark red.

Droplets hit the tiles below, blooming like red flowers on the floor, and the sharp, distinctive smell filled my nose.

While I stood there, completely lost, there was a knock at the bathroom door.

“…Are you okay?”

It was Yuna’s voice.

She peeked nervously through the gap from the hallway, worry plain on her face.

“Uh…”

Our eyes met.

I’d left the bathroom door wide open.

“Oh, you made a mess.”

After taking one look at my state, Yuna stepped inside and closed the door behind her.

Without saying anything more, she moved quickly, starting to clean up as if it were the most natural thing in the world.

“I-I can do it myself…”

Even if it was Yuna, I didn’t want someone else handling something like this. More than anything, I felt bad.

“You saying that with a face like you’re about to pass out doesn’t exactly inspire confidence... Come on, I’ll take care of this, so just get under the shower and rinse off, okay?”

“...Okay…”

Overwhelmed by Yuna’s assertiveness, I nodded instinctively.

And honestly, I was grateful for the offer.

I stripped off my clothes, tied my hair up behind my head, and rinsed my lower body under the shower. As the blood washed away, I felt a little calmer.

When I stopped the shower, Yuna opened the bathroom door and handed me a bath towel. After I dried myself off, she passed me a nighttime pad and fresh underwear. Next came a camisole, and finally, a jersey to use as pajamas.

Yuna took the soiled clothes and put them straight into the washing machine.

“I’ve been relying on you so much since ending up in this body, huh…”

After finishing the cleanup thanks to Yuna’s help, I said that self-deprecatingly.

Yuna placed a gentle hand on my head and smiled softly.

“Don’t worry about it. When it comes to being a girl, I’ve got way more experience than you. So it’s fine, Alice. You can lean on me.”

The mixture of helplessness, vulnerability, and gratitude hit all at once, and tears spilled from my eyes.

“Ugh…”

Yuna pulled me into a hug.

For a while, I clung to her, crying freely as the emotions overwhelmed me.

“Happy birthday, Alice.”

Eventually, once I’d calmed down a little, Yuna spoke, still holding me close.

“Yeah… thanks, Yuna.”

It seemed midnight had already passed at some point. My birthday had begun.

This was my first birthday as Alice. Starting today, I’d officially be sixteen.

And for us—for 『me』 and Alicia—it was supposed to be the seventeenth birthday.

But the one who should have been here with me, celebrating together, wasn’t.

“…So, Alicia still hasn’t come back yet?”

“…Yeah.”

“I see…”

Yuna gently patted my back as if to comfort me.

“…Thank you.”

Having Yuna there, worried about Alicia’s absence, helped calm me down a little.

At this point, I decided I might as well fully lean on her today.

“Yuna… would you sleep with me tonight?”

When those words left my mouth, Yuna was surprised for a moment but then smiled and agreed.

“Alright then, I’ll come to Alice’s room.”

Back in my room, the two of us got into bed together. The blankets, folded back, had grown cold from the night air.

“Brr, it’s cold… Here, Alice.”

Yuna slipped under the covers first and wrapped her arms around me. Her warmth pressed against my chilled body, and we held each other close to share heat.

Buried in Yuna’s soft chest, I was wrapped in a comforting sense of security.

…With this, maybe I’d finally be able to sleep without nightmares.

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