Chapter 24: funeral (Part 3)

Once Hisui left, the rest of us were left sitting in the now-empty guest room, and the atmosphere felt awkward.

Fortunately, that tension didn’t last long. The arrival of the next visitors swept it away.

“It’s been a while, Yuna-san.”

The guests were Mitsuhiro Kamishiro, father of both Souta and Hisui, and his son—Hisui’s twin brother—Souta Kamishiro.

“Thank you for coming today on behalf of my brother.”

“I’m truly sorry to hear about Ikuto-san… And who might this be?”

With my silver hair, which looked completely un-Japanese, and matching clothes with Yuna, I probably didn’t look like a typical mourner. It was only natural for Uncle Mitsuhiro to be suspicious.

“My name is Kisaragi Alice. Due to certain circumstances, I’ve become the adopted child of Father Ikuto. I hope we can become acquainted from now on.”

“Alice-san, I see. I’m Mitsuhiro Kamishiro, the head priest at the neighborhood shrine. And this here is my son—”

“We’ve met before, haven’t we, Souta-san? Do you remember me?”

“…Yeah. No way I’d forget someone with such a striking appearance. Now that you mention it, you said you heard about me from my sister. Didn’t expect that to be Yuna…”

“It’s good to see you again too, Souta-nii. Thank you for coming for my brother.”

At those words, Souta’s face twitched slightly. It seemed like he’d just remembered the real reason he came.

The two of them silently sat side by side in front of the altar, bowed, each lit a stick of incense from the candle on the stand, and placed it in the incense burner.

They stared at my photo, then closed their eyes and put their hands together in silent prayer.

There was something oddly surreal about a Shinto priest praying for someone who had become a Buddhist spirit.

“…Ikuto… I’m sorry…”

Those words, spoken from a grimace of anguish on Souta’s face, didn’t escape my notice.

“Souta-san… My brother-in-law died because of his own carelessness… There’s no reason for you to feel responsible.”

It would be a problem if he just started blaming himself. My death was entirely my own fault.

Souta was taken aback by the sudden remark, but he quickly fired back.

“He was struggling. He kept it all bottled up, couldn’t talk to anyone, and that’s why it ended up like that… If I’d just been there for him—!”

“Nothing would’ve changed. There was nothing you could have done to prevent his death.”

I flatly rejected Souta’s regretful words.

“…Are you mocking me?”

“Aren’t you the one mocking him? Are you saying your friend Ikuto was the kind of fool who’d throw away his life just because he got rejected by a girl?”

“…What the hell do you know!?”

“I know more than you think. I mean, come on—if he had someone he liked, there’s no way Ikuto wouldn’t have come to you first. Can’t you even see that much?”

“I thought that too! But then he suddenly disappeared, and when I heard he’d been struggling—!”

“Both of you, that’s enough.”

Our heated argument was cut off by Uncle Mitsuhiro’s calm but commanding voice. He didn’t raise his volume, but there was more than enough force behind his words to silence us.

“This is a place to honor the dead… It is not a place to raise your voices.”

Still smiling, Uncle Mitsuhiro spoke with gentle firmness.

“…Sorry, Uncle.”

I apologized for causing a scene.

…But I had no intention of apologizing to Souta.

“…Sorry, Yuna.”

Souta, too, apologized—but only to Yuna. It seemed he didn’t plan to apologize to me either.

“Well then, since that’s all we came for, we’ll be on our way. Please give my regards to your father and mother.”

“…Yes. Thank you for coming.”

Once the two of them left and the room was empty again, Yuna jabbed me with her elbow.

“You overdid it.”

“…Sorry.”

“Well… I can’t say I don’t get how you feel.”

Yuna shrugged her shoulders.


As night fell, the guests slowly trickled out, and my funeral came to an end.

I returned to my room, slipped into bed, and began speaking with Alicia. Chatting with her before sleep had become a daily routine—an aimless, gentle ritual that had come to mean a lot to me.

『What do you think about the two of them, Alicia?』

『The two of them… You mean Souta-san and Hisui-san? They both seemed to care about you deeply, Ikuto-san. That’s why I think they took your death harder than anyone else.』

『…Yeah, I thought so too.』

『Aren’t you going to tell them the truth, about who you are?』

『…I want to. Honestly, I really do. But I’m torn. If I tell Souta, I’d have to expose the lies his girlfriend told him… That might ruin his entire relationship. And Hisui…』

『Did you have feelings for Hisui-san?』

『…I don’t know. She was definitely important to me as a childhood friend, and outside of family, she was the girl I was closest to. But whether that was romantic or not… I’m not really sure.』

『I think Hisui-san probably had romantic feelings for you.』

『I kind of knew that. Deep down. But at the time, I was scared of ruining the comfort we had as childhood friends. I pretended not to notice… because I knew that once I acknowledged it, things would never stay the same.』

『Is that why you’re not telling her the truth now?』

『Because… the Ikuto she loved is already gone. If I showed up now as I am, wouldn’t that just hurt her even more?』

『…If it were me, even if you were different, I’d still want to know you were alive.』

『…Yeah. I’ll tell her. Once she’s moved on—once she’s found someone else and the pain has dulled—I’ll come forward.』

『Please try to do it sooner rather than later… I’m sure she’s still waiting.』

『Alright, I should get some sleep. Good night, Alicia.』

『Good night, Ikuto-san.』

I closed my eyes, bringing to a close the day of my own funeral.

From this moment on, the name Kisaragi Ikuto no longer existed, in name or in form. From now on, I would live as Kisaragi Alice.

It was a path full of uncertainty and hardship no matter how I looked at it—but so long as I had Alicia by my side, I felt like we could overcome anything together.

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