Chapter 14: Yukino Yukinoshita is Still Trapped

(Author's Note: Rereading the original work, I thought it was very like Yukinon to refer to Kinkaku-ji by its formal name, Rokuon-ji.)

A calm, comfortable atmosphere flowed through the Service Club after getting past the major event that was the Cultural Festival. After school, the three of us gathered in the clubroom, idly waiting for requesters who might never come.

Days a bit too peaceful to really call club activities. But to me, they were irreplaceable.

Noticing the electric kettle bubbling, I set my magazine aside and began preparing to brew black tea. Yuigahama-san, quick to notice, beamed with innocent joy.

"Yay, snacks!"

Having grown accustomed to making tea, I poured three cups with brisk efficiency. In the slightly chilly clubroom, three trails of steam rose from the tea.

I placed the cups in front of the two of them and set the tea snacks Yuigahama-san had brought in the center of the table. Thus, our after-school teatime preparations were complete.

"Thanks, Yukinon."

"...Thanks."

I answered their words of gratitude with a light nod. Just that made my chest feel a little bit warmer.

Without anyone proposing a toast, the three of us somehow brought our tea to our lips at the exact same time. The warm liquid flowed down my throat, its faint warmth seeping into my slightly chilled body.

"The school trip is coming up soon! Have you guys decided where you want to go yet?"

Prompted by Yuigahama-san's cheerful voice, I recalled the contents of the travel magazine I had just been reading.

Our school trip destination was decided to be Kyoto. The ancient western capital is full of charm. From venerable shrines and temples to historic tourist spots, there are plenty of places worth seeing.

Speaking a little quickly, I began.

"Well, it's cliché, but Rokuon-ji is a must-see. Then there's Jishou-ji. Ah, and I definitely want to see the dry landscape garden at Ryouan-ji at least once. Also, considering we'll be preparing for entrance exams next year, Kitano Tenmangu is definitely a place we should visit. ...Yuigahama-san, you should go there too."

"Huh, why's that?"

"Because it enshrines the god of academics. You're especially in need of that, aren't you, Yuigahama-san?"

"...Wait, did you just call me an idiot!?"

"It's just your imagination."

After our usual exchange, Hikigaya-kun directed a deadpan stare at me. His stagnant eyes seemed to be thinking, "Wow, what a terrible personality!"

"Wouldn't you, being a siscon, want to go too, Hikigaya-kun? Your little sister is taking entrance exams, isn't she?"

"True, but... you really have a solid grasp on my sister's situation."

"...Just a coincidence."

I couldn't exactly say, "I know all about the Hikigaya family because I've reread the source material countless times."

I observed Hikigaya-kun for a moment, wondering if he suspected anything weird, but he didn't seem to care that much. Muttering, "Hmm, as expected of Yuki-pedia," he sipped his tea.

Looking at his face, I casually recalled the events of the school trip.

"The school trip, huh..."

"What's wrong, Yukinon? Are you worried about something?"

"...No. I just felt a little pity, thinking about what a painful event it must be for Hikigaya-kun, who doesn't have any friends."

I haphazardly covered up the words that had slipped from my mouth.

His eyes clouding over at my half-hearted excuse, Hikigaya-kun attempted a counterattack.

"You don't have any friends in class either, you know."

"It's true that I don't have friends, but I do have classmates who invite me to things. I'd appreciate it if you didn't lump me in with you, someone whose name they haven't even remembered."

"You even know that my classmates haven't memorized my name...?"

"..."

Crap. I slipped up again. Now it just sounds like I'm deeply interested in him.

"...Anyway, Yukinon, you haven't spoken in your 'boku' tone at all since then. Weren't you going to be your true self in the clubroom?"

Struck suddenly where it hurts, I gently averted my eyes from Yuigahama-san, who was staring straight at me. But her gaze remained fixed on my face.

A few seconds of being stared at in silence passed, and the sound of Hikigaya-kun crunching on snacks seemed awfully loud.

"I get it. It's 'my' loss. ...Is this better?"

"Yeah!"

If she says it with such a satisfied look, then 'I' have no choice but to endure the embarrassment.

Having silently watched our exchange the whole time, Hikigaya-kun called out with the corners of his mouth slightly raised.

"Weak to Yuigahama, as always."

"I can't help it, can I... I mean, 'I' can't defy a smiling Yuigahama-san."

Hikigaya-kun watched 'me' stumble over my words with that persistent smirk. ...It was an incredibly infuriating expression.

"Hikigaya-kun, should I reveal what you did to 'me' when we rode the gondola at the Cultural Festival right here and now?"

I know it was an accident caused by the cramped space of the gondola, but touching 'my' body is still a felony. Even now, I wouldn't hesitate to report him.

"...No, seriously, that was completely out of my control. It was my fault, so please forgive me."

"Hmph. If you understand, then don't ever think about teasing 'me' again."

"...Hikki, whenever you're talking to Yukinon in her 'boku' tone, you always have a bit of a smirk on your face."

Watching our back-and-forth, Yuigahama-san muttered quietly. Hearing her words, Hikigaya-kun became visibly shaken.

"No, it's just amusing to see Yukinoshita, whose sharp tongue usually pisses me off, in such a weakened state. It's not like I have any impure feelings or anything."

"Hmm..."

Yuigahama-san narrowed her eyes, staring intently at Hikigaya-kun's flustered state.

As I watched Hikigaya-kun—who had been acting so tough just moments ago—cower under Yuigahama-san's deadpan glare, I drank my tea. Yes, drinking while watching Hikigaya-kun panic makes it taste delicious.

While savoring the tea, I suddenly remembered something.

"Oh, that's right. If you two don't mind, would you like to go around together during the free time on the third day of the school trip?"

"Of course! I'm so glad you brought it up, Yukinon."

Yuigahama-san smiled from the bottom of her heart. As always, she's a girl whose every expression is charming.

"Hikki's fine with it too, right?"

"...Well, I guess it's fine."

Hikigaya-kun agreed in a seemingly reluctant manner.

"Even though you're happy you get to go around with Yuigahama-san, you just end up acting unsociable, huh, Hikigaya-kun? Can't be helped. You're a high school boy, after all."

When 'I' nodded understandingly, Hikigaya-kun directed his rotting eyes at me in protest.

"Is that so? ...That's embarrassing."

Yuigahama-san said with her face slightly red. So cute.

It was just as 'I' was about to continue and start discussing where the three of us should go.

The clubroom door was knocked on about three times. The moment I heard that sound, 'I' instantly put on my mask—my outer shell—and returned to being Yukino Yukinoshita.

"Come in."

Responding to my voice, the people who entered the clubroom were Tobe-kun and the rest of Hayama-kun's clique. ─Ah, so they're coming after all.

"Can I help you?"

When I asked, they, who had been staring around the clubroom, turned toward us and began explaining their circumstances.

Tobe-kun wanted to confess to Ebina-san in his group, and he wanted our help with it.

To summarize, that was the gist of it. Before he got to such a simple request, there was a lot of wasted time—like blurting out unnecessary things about how he couldn't talk to the untrustworthy Hikigaya-kun, or hesitating over whether to speak up or not—but well, history moved just as I knew it would.

"...But I don't think we, as outsiders, would be of any use to you."

"Nah, please, just help me out here. Yukinoshita-san, pretty please!"

With a light tone, yet with serious eyes, Tobe-kun pleaded with me.

"Hey, hey, Yukinon, let's help him out. He seems pretty serious about it."

Glancing sideways to see Yuigahama-san chiming in to ask as well, I crossed my arms and gathered my thoughts.

Honestly, I'm not feeling up to it. Because if I accept this request, things might end up going exactly like the original work.

Hikigaya-kun's fake confession. And then, the rejection from the two members of the Service Club who deny his methods. A huge rift would form between the three of us who had built such a comfortable relationship.

Even if I don't reject Hikigaya-kun, I'm sure Yuigahama-san wouldn't take kindly to it.

─Besides, more than anything else, I hate the idea of the current relationship in the Service Club collapsing.

This cozy space where the three of us gather in the clubroom for no particular reason and spend our idle time together might disappear. I absolutely hate that.

At first, it was purely out of a sense of duty. I founded the Service Club just to follow the original story. I accepted Hikigaya-kun because he's the protagonist. I befriended Yuigahama-san to keep to the original plot. That was how it was supposed to be.

Before I knew it, those two had found their way deep inside me—no, inside 'me'—and now they've become irreplaceable to 'me'.

That's why I don't want to lose this relationship. I couldn't care less anymore about whether it's for Hikigaya-kun's growth or if it's a turning point the three of us need to overcome. 'I' loved our current relationship so much that I couldn't help but feel that way.

However, reality pushes time forward, as if entirely ignorant of my feelings.

"──Yukinon, let's help him out."

Yuigahama-san looked serious, unlike just a moment ago. I know. I know that when she makes a face like that, she won't back down easily. She won't give up.

Caught in a dilemma between the concerns inside me and Yuigahama-san's earnest eyes, I instinctively checked on Hikigaya-kun.

He just waited for my words without saying a thing.

──His pitch-black eyes felt as if they were watching to see whether I was acting like Yukino Yukinoshita. That's how it seemed.

"...I suppose it can't be helped. If you insist that much, let's at least consider his request."

In the end, I decided to accept Yuigahama-san's plea, and Tobe-kun's request. One reason was that I hated the idea of deviating from the flow of the original work. Another was that I was swayed by Yuigahama-san's earnest eyes.

And finally, perhaps one piece of my own paranoia.

Ah, good grief. Being your true self is so incredibly difficult, isn't it?