Chapter 27: When You Gather Friends Together, They End Up Becoming Friends with Each Other and You End Up Being a Loner

When You Gather Friends Together, They End Up Becoming Friends with Each Other and You End Up Being a Loner

Currently, I have five main friendships. That's a small number.

First is Tomohiro-kun. He's the famous Snack-kun. I snack on him regularly and it's delicious. His sexual fetishes are so twisted and frozen, it's charming. I think I'm about to win the heart of the neighbor mom.

Second is Satoshi-kun. He's a friend and weirdo who greets people in a weird way. He's a very smart kid, and my number one candidate for sparkle. Is he a weirdo because he's smart, or does he seem smart because he's a weirdo? A chicken-and-egg debate is about to begin. The solution is to eat both.

Third is Shota-kun. He's an athlete who's into karate. He's grown up and returned to me, never able to forget the taste of defeat etched in his memory as a child. He's my second sparkling candidate. I think that because of the taste of defeat etched in his body, he can only get pleasure from being dominated and defeated by a petite woman. It's a sexual fetish that's unbecoming of an athlete. A healthy body should be able to dwell in healthy sexual fetishes.

Fourth is Miho-san. Miho-san is Miho Mana. Unusually for me, I use her last name to refer to her, even in my thought. ...Why do I use her last name, unlike the other three? Because it's a bit embarrassing to call friends by their first names. It's embarrassing to be made to say it. The three guys are a sweet Chihuahua, a creepy strange creature, and a mischievous big dog. It's rude to even compare them.

And finally, there's my precious family, my little sister and Mama. My little sister is so tender you could put her in your eyes, but a little salty in your mouth, and my Mama is a really suspicious person. Eh, don't include your family in your social circle? If I don't do that, I'll end up feeling lonely. I hope you can understand.

Now, the reason I made the effort to explain these few friendships is because an unusual incident occurred: the majority of them were all gathered together.

Shota-kun, who was playing in the match game, Miho-san, who decided to go with me, Tomohiro-kun, who was going out with me, and my little sister, who tagged along because she was bored.

Everyone was there except for Satoshi! It's a miracle!

...To begin with, until I was in high school, I only had three friendships: Tomohiro-kun and Satoshi-kun at school, and my family at home.

Wow, surprisingly, the majority of them were together. Thinking about it like that, it didn't seem like a big deal, so my slightly excited mood suddenly dropped. Oh well, whatever. Everyone, let's go home now!

But even though I was thinking that, I couldn't bring myself to say that, so I introduced each of them, saying that everyone was here.

Since everyone had gathered around me, there were many pairs of people who were meeting each other for the first time today.

There were six possible combinations of four people, like a math problem. Of those, two pairs were first-time meetings, two pairs were people I'd barely spoken to, and two pairs were people I knew. ......Oh, so only one-third of the pairings were first-time encounters. That's less than I thought.

Just as my motivation for the introductions was waning, I clung to my little sister for some replenishment. She'd been attracting attention from the two other students going to other schools because she looks just like me, but now her face was bright red with embarrassment as her beloved big sister suddenly hugged her. A Shuuchirorinium seeps into my troubled heart.

My motivation was restored thanks to my little sister's noble sacrifice, and I secured a spot where I could watch Shota-kun's match.

It's morning now, and Shota-kun will be playing matches frequently until around the evening. We each have plans after noon, so we were only here in the morning.

Tell me next time how it felt to go from a fun match with everyone watching to a quiet, lonely one.

After the introductions were finished, Shota-kun was called, so we started watching straight away.

Akari-chan will be the play-by-play announcer, and I, the humble Hikari-chan, will be the commentator. 

Both are cute girls. Yay! They even have the same voice, so the listeners are sure to be confused.

Now, Shota-kun's match has begun, and the fighters have already entered the arena. Since this isn't a proper tournament, things are pretty relaxed. Both fighters are currently chatting amiably. They're both carefree, even though a bloody battle is about to begin.

Ehh...Mashiro-san, commentator, what's going on here?

This is Mashiro-san, your commentator. Karate is both a sport and duel. In both, the important thing is mutual respect. Showing courtesy without being obsequious. 

They may be rivals during a match, but they're friends outside of it. It's probably a good thing to get along as long as the tension doesn't fade.

I see, I don't have respect, so this is a lesson for me. Oops, the match is about to start while we're talking! Both fighters bow deeply and gaze at each other!

They're both measuring their distance. The distance they can react to after their opponent moves and the distance they can reach when attacking are basically the same for both fighters if they're the same build. The glaring at each other is a balance of these two things. It's also a way to gauge their opponent's moves.

...As I played around with commentating and announcing the match by myself using ventriloquism, my companions' eyes were focused on me rather than the match.

In particular, my little sister, whose name I'd used without her permission, was so red it was almost pitiful. Today is Shuuchirorinium day.

It seemed that Shota-kun and the other, who were being commentated on, were feeling a bit uncomfortable, so I'll end my commentary here. Instead, I'll explain more thoroughly.

Everyone here with me right now has almost no interest in karate. It's my job as the one who invited them to turn a sport they don't understand into something they know, so they can enjoy it.

I explain the rules carefully, using intonation to make them easy to hear and understand, and I also explain the semi-routine tactics between the fighters in each match. As we continue, watching Shota-kun's match and a few others, everyone begins to get a general understanding of karate.

While I'm explaining, I also give Shota-kun some criticism and advice, which upsets him when he comes over after a match. It must be pretty depressing to be criticized by someone you invited to show off.

So sad.

Well, I may not have lost to Shota-kun, but I quit karate years ago. My advice probably isn't all that helpful, and it might even be off the mark.

"Wow, Akari-chan, you draw pictures. You're really good at it!...Is your sister better? Hikari-chan, you can draw pictures too?"

While I was busy with Shota-kun, Miho-san, who seemed to have a lot of free time, set her sights on my younger sister because she looks just like me.

Miho-san, a master of communication skills, was able to have conversations like, "You're so cute, how old are you? Where do you live? Do you use LINE?" without making my younger sister feel uncomfortable.

She spilled all her personal information as she asked, and eventually even told her about my hobby, woodworking.

Although I'm not really hiding it that seriously, it's not something I want to open up about, so I tell her to keep it a secret. I don't want people to ask me things like, "Draw something for a friend!" or "It's fine if it's free!" because just asking them will cut into my budget.

"In that case, I won't tell anyone, but I'd like to see your drawings and creations next time, Hikari-chan. Is that okay?"

Miho-san clasps her arms in front of her chest and looks up slightly. Even though she's taller than me, she's probably doing it on purpose. She's so cunning. But I love that kind of cuteness.

Artificial cuteness is something that's born out of a certain desire, so sometimes it surpasses natural cuteness.

It's the same as how selectively bred fruit tastes better than the original species. Girls wear ten or twenty cat costumes to bring out their cuteness even more.

Eh, where do the cat costume come from? I hate clever brats like you.

I promise to do it the next time she come over, and I decide to get Miho-san to wear cat ears.

While I'm there, I'll get a remote-controlled tail.

A tail that sways back and forth, and cat ears that move up and down.  

So cunning. Just thinking about it is so cunning.

Seeing poor Tomohiro-kun being left alone during this exchange, I smile inside and tell Shota-kun it's almost time for everyone to go back.

I have to go on a date with my little sister and help her refresh after all that studying.