Chapter 16: Surely, a Love Not Yet Lost

Before me stood a bamboo pole wrapped in straw. The ground was bare earth.

Stone walls enclosed the space... and behind me, Frauera stood with her arms crossed.

This was the training ground—a short walk from the grand cathedral of the holy sanctuary, Leyline.

A small bell rang—clear, sharp.

In that moment, my fingers brushed the rosary at my chest—

—It shifted, became the greatsword Claymore—

—I gripped the hilt.

"Hah!"

I swung.

The motion was faster than folding three fingers.

The pole split cleanly in two.

A breath tore from my lungs as sweat dripped onto the dirt. Behind me, I heard footsteps crunching closer.

"Passable."

Frauera’s voice, flat as ever. I turned.

I’d been training under her guidance.

The sequence just now—

Transforming the sacred silver. Drawing the blade. Swinging with precision.

All of it, drilled to be instinctive.

For us, the Demon Banishers, sacred silver is our only weapon against demons.

And if we fail to defend against a demon's blow—

At best? A critical injury. At worst? Instant death.

Rank doesn’t matter. Whether low or high, no Banisher is safe.

Sure, ether boosts strength and resilience. It helps with falls, crashes.

But if a demon lands a direct hit?

No one walks away from that.

That’s why reflexes are everything.

The moment you sense a threat, you transform your sacred silver and strike back.

That single instant—

That sliver of time—

Is the line between life and death.

And that's why Frauera drills reflexes, above all else.

"...Passable?"

I gasped for air. My sweat poured freely, soaking into my clothes.

Frauera’s philosophy? “Reflexes at peak condition mean nothing.”

What matters is performance under exhaustion—when your body’s heavy and your mind’s clouded.

Otherwise, it’s meaningless.

So I trained. Three hours of swings.

Then more—quick-draws with sacred silver.

Now, my arms were lead. My legs numb. My breathing ragged.

“Far from perfect. Not flawless—but sufficient. Hence, passable.”

Frauera touched her rosary—

Thud. The severed pole hit the ground, cleanly bisected.

A halberd rested in her hands.

I hadn’t seen her transform it. Hadn’t seen her swing.

Yet—

"...Hm. A tad sluggish."

I grimaced.

This is normal for her.

I train under Frauera regularly, but her standards are... not normal.

Elsie once told me: “Even among high-rank Banishers, her weapon mastery is top tier.”

When that is your benchmark... yeah, it’s brutal.

But that’s fine.

I want to get stronger.

I have to. To protect—

That’s why I endure it.

Frauera reverted the halberd back to her rosary and looked at me.

“Still... you’ve improved, Yuri.”

“Th-thank you...”

“Let’s rest. Time for lunch.”

I clutched my stomach. Nausea rolled through me from sheer fatigue.

“...U-um, right now, I don’t think I can—”

“Eating while fatigued is a necessary skill for Banishers.”

“Ugh...”

...Resigned, I nodded.

Dragged by Frauera, I left the training grounds and got pulled into a nearby room.

On the simple table sat two suspiciously large lunch boxes.

Frauera must’ve brought them... but she can’t cook. Maybe the church cafeteria?

But more importantly—

“Uh... these are kinda huge?”

“Post-exercise meals build the body. Thus, eat accordingly.”

“...Right.”

I opened the lid.

Grilled corn. Mashed beans. Clean cuts of white chicken meat.

All tightly packed into the oversized box.

I forced a smile and nibbled some corn.

...Lightly salted. Bland, but not bad.

Watching me, Frauera spoke.

“Well? Not bad, is it?”

“…I guess it’s okay.”

“They’re trialing new rations. Test samples.”

“Test samples?”

“The cafeteria head’s an old friend. We’re working on post-training meals others might benefit from.”

“Others...?”

I rested my chin in my hand.

Who else gets force-fed after being pushed to the edge?

...Probably just Frauera’s disciples.

“Do you mentor anyone else besides me?”

“No. Took a few in, but aside from you and Elsie, they all quit. Spineless.”

“...Yeah.”

Memories flashed through my mind—

Getting hit with cotton-wrapped sticks. Running laps around Leyline’s outer wall. Sprinting through knee-deep water until I collapsed. Getting drenched to wake up. Being thrown again and again for “fall training.”

I could only smile wryly.

“What? Got something to say?”

“...N-no, it’s just... I’m grateful for your training, Frauera.”

I forced down another bite of the flavorless bean paste.

Not bad, but... okay, maybe a little bad. The pale color made me wonder if they’d mixed in cheese. Anything to distract myself.

Frauera rubbed her temple, ignoring my struggle.

“Hmph. Fine. I’m aware my methods are... somewhat intense.”

...Somewhat?

Somewhat?!

That had to be the understatement of the century.

I swallowed the paste and moved to the bland white chicken—barely salted, but at least edible.

“Anyway, Yuri. Changing the subject—there’s something I want to ask.”

“...Ask me?”

“Yeah. Did something happen between you and Elsie?”

“...‘Something’ like what?”

I tilted my head. Nothing jumped out—unless she meant Elsie catching a cold after our last mission. She got soaked, fever spiked... but she was fine by morning.

“Hm. Yesterday, I ran into her outside the church. Or rather, saw her.”

Frauera crossed her arms, eyes closing in thought like she was piecing together a crime scene.

“She was buying lingerie.”

“Ghk—!?”

The chicken caught in my throat.

“You good?”

“W-what kind of question is that!? People buy underwear all the time... right...?”

Unfortunately, my brain dragged up the memory of the other day—Elsie in her undergarments. I shook my head, trying to delete it.

“Wait. Hear me out. Normally, hers are plain. But this time—”

That image popped up again. Simple white fabric. The soft light of her room—

Stop. Apologize to Elsie in your heart, you creep.

Guilt bubbled in my gut. I shot Frauera a weak glare.

“S-so what? How’s that my business?”

“It is.”

“Huh?”

She ignored my confusion and kept going.

“Yesterday’s set was flashy. Not her usual style.”

“F-flashy?”

Cue mental slideshow: Elsie in flashy lingerie.

What even counted as flashy? Unless—

“Curious?”

“N-no—”

“Black lace.”

Black. Lace. On Elsie.

THUD.

My forehead met the table.

“What the hell was that?”

“...Self-punishment.”

She had no filter. Was she doing this on purpose?

Desperate to change the subject, I mumbled:

“Okay, but—why does Elsie buying... that... matter to me?”

Frauera raised a finger like a prosecutor delivering the final blow.

“Lingerie’s pointless unless someone sees it. Some women wear it for confidence. But Elsie? That’s not her type.”

“...I guess not...?”

Elsie never cared about appearances. Always wore church robes or practical clothes.

“Exactly. Same plain stuff for years.”

“Uh-huh...?”

Why did Frauera know this much?

“So why the sudden change? Think.”

“How would I know!?”

This was insane. Elsie’s underwear was none of my—

“It’s battle lingerie. For showing off.”

“...What.”

And just like that, my resolve cracked.

Showing off. Meaning—someone close enough to see it.

A lover?

Did she have a boyfriend?

“Or it’s insurance. In case someone sees it by accident.”

“...How’s that different?”

“‘Showing’ and ‘being seen’ are worlds apart.”

I frowned. The second option sounded worse. Like... someone walking in unexpectedly?

“Still, what’s this got to do with—”

“Either way, she’s aware of men now. Romantically.”

“Elsie... is?”

So she had feelings for someone. Not necessarily dating... but preparing, just in case?

And why shouldn’t she? She was cute, skilled, kind—

I clenched my jaw.

I hated that it bothered me.

Couldn’t even blame Frauera anymore. I was too far gone.

“...Why the long face?”

“...No reason.”

Self-loathing settled in my chest. It felt... heavy.

“Look. That’s why I asked if something happened between you two.”

“...Why would it circle back to me?”

Frauera blinked. Then her eyes narrowed. Every hint of amusement vanished.

“I won’t say ‘figure it out,’ but damn, you’re dense. Zero experience?”

She sighed and muttered something under her breath.

I crossed my arms, trying to connect the dots—

—And then it hit me.

“Wait... are you saying Elsie might have feelings for me?”

“Obviously.”

“...Haah. That’s impossible.”

Frauera was a reliable senior Exorcist—but she had one fatal flaw.

A hopeless romantic.

She’d cling to these delusions and state them like gospel.

“No, I’m right. I can tell—just by watching Elsie lately.”

“...Come on, there’s no way—”

“Why deny it? Would it not make you happy?”

“I mean... if Elsie actually liked me, of course I’d be happy. But she doesn’t even see me as a man.”

I crossed my arms, sighing at how pitiful that sounded out loud.

Just the other day, she’d casually let me see her in her underwear. That kind of comfort? There’s no way she saw me as anything more than a teammate.

“Yet she treats you differently than others.”

“...That’s because we’re partners.”

“Hm. Is it?”

Frauera closed her eyes, arms folded.

Had she finally dropped it?

But the silence that followed left a hollowness in my chest.

“...Uh, this conversation’s getting painful. Can we stop?”

“...Fine. If you insist.”

“Why’d you say it like that? Ugh...”

I shoveled more of the tasteless meal into my mouth, eager to change the subject.

Frauera, naturally, was watching me with a calculating look.

That never meant anything good.

---

Later, we trained for another three hours before parting ways. Frauera had a mission to attend to.

She worked solo these days—not by choice, but because she often responded to distress calls from low- and mid-rank Exorcists.

Tonight was no different. She took those calls constantly.

“To reduce unnecessary deaths,” she’d once said.

And despite that, she still made time to train me.

I owed her more than I could repay.

After cooling off at the wash area near the training grounds, I let the water run over me, rinsing away the sweat.

This wasn’t well water. It came from a Miracle Sigil—used daily by the church’s Saints. Unlike the counterfeit versions issued to standard Exorcists, true Sigils didn’t consume Ether.

Exhausting to overuse, but functionally limitless.

Which meant: endless, flowing water.

“............”

Even so, my thoughts drifted.

Back to Elsie.

She, too, was a Saint—with a Sigil of her own.

But hers came at a cost.

“Pain for power,” she’d once said.

A lie.

If pain was all it took, she’d use it more freely.

But Elsie always sacrificed too easily. Too quickly.

There had to be something more. A greater cost.

Something that could end her career as an Exorcist.

Maybe even her life.

“...I have to get stronger.”

Not just to protect her.

But so she’d never feel forced to use that Sigil.

Because if I hesitated, even once, she’d pay the price without flinching.

“...Haaah.”

A single droplet fell.

I shook my head and dried off with a thick cloth. Even “limitless” water shouldn’t be wasted.

Clothed in clean robes, I debated heading to the library—

—When I saw her.

A familiar silhouette leaning against the hallway wall.

“You’re late.”

“...Elsie? Why are you—?”

The very person I’d just been agonizing over.

“Hah? You summoned me.”

“What? No, I didn’t—”

“Excuse me?”

Her brow furrowed. I looked away, already sensing the setup.

Wait.

“...Frauera told you?”

“Obviously. I was in the library when she said you wanted me here—”

We both connected the dots.

“...Oh no.”

Unwanted meddling.

I cursed Frauera internally. (Out loud would’ve been rude.)

Elsie had no such restraint.

“That matchmaking moron—!”

...Yeah. Best not mention the lingerie part.

She’d explode.

“Sorry, Elsie.”

“...Why are you apologizing? seriously....”

She crossed her arms, scowling.

But not at me.

Elsie crossed her arms, shook her head, and finally spoke.

“So?”

“S-so... what?”

When I echoed her question, her expression darkened again.

“You made me wait here, and now you’re just gonna send me away with nothing?”

“Ah... right. What should we do?”

“You tell me.”

I rubbed the back of my neck, thinking.

She probably hated playing into Frauera’s meddling—but being left hanging after waiting pissed her off more.

After a pause, I offered:

“Then... wanna get dinner somewhere?”

Outside, the sky burned amber. Perfect timing for a meal in town.

For just a moment, Elsie’s expression softened.

“...Fine. But—”

“My treat.”

I sealed the deal—

—Wait.

Her face immediately soured again.

“Hah? Why would you pay? That makes no sense.”

“Eh? Because I kept you wai—”

Before I could finish, Elsie’s hands shot out—pinching both my cheeks and pulling.

“Hyah?! Fwah—eek?!”

It didn’t hurt, but talking was impossible.

“You’re only inviting me out of guilt?”

I shook my head wildly.

Okay, yeah—my wording did sound like a pity offer.

Grabbing her wrists, I freed my face.

“N-no! I just... want to eat with you. That’s all.”

As I spoke, I met her eyes—

—Only to find her blushing, gaze flicking away.

“............”

“...Elsie?”

“Your... hand.”

“Hand?”

She glanced between my face and—

—Oh.

I was still holding her wrists.

“S-sorry!”

I let go like she’d burned me.

Elsie stepped back—three quick paces. Glaring.

The distance between us grew—and with it, the weight in my gut.

I grabbed a girl’s wrists without thinking.

Regret churned in my stomach.

Then—sniff.

Elsie turned her nose up.

“...Just don’t do it again.”

Still avoiding my eyes.

“...Sorry, Elsie.”

“Whatever. Not like I care.”

Her face stayed red.

Was she mad?

Or...?

Eventually, I coaxed her into leaving the church with me. No real plan—just away.

---

The open air seemed to lift her mood.

Though the townsfolk gave us a wide berth.

Our Exorcist robes marked us as church affiliates—not feared, but respectfully avoided. Leyline’s streets were pious; its people, devout. Exorcists were revered.

A status I still didn’t understand.

“Yuri, when’d you start training today?”

“Huh? Oh—9 a.m.”

The question caught me off guard.

Elsie frowned.

“You said today was your day off. Do you like training that much?”

“Like...? More like, if I’m not moving, I get restless.”

“...Right. You should get a hobby. Even saints need breaks.”

She sighed, exasperated—

—Which irritated me.

“What about you? What’d you do today?”

“...Checked mission postings. Read in the library.”

Hypocrite.

She told me to rest—but spent her morning working.

“What’d you read?”

“...None of your business.”

Exactly.

Not leisure reading. Something dense. Technical—

“...Got a problem?”

One arched eyebrow. She’d seen right through me.

“N-nothing!”

“...Hmph.”

I wiped cold sweat from my brow.

...Yeah. We’d grown closer. Banter came easier now.

But sometimes—like now—her stare still froze me solid.

Then—

“...Ah.”

My eyes landed on a storefront.

A lingerie shop.

Behind the glass—delicate fabrics, barely there.

Black. Lace.

“...Yuri?”

“Eh?! Wh-what?”

I snapped my head back to her—too late.

Elsie had already followed my gaze.

“...You like that kind of underwear?”

“WH—?!”

My heart nearly exploded.

Like it?! That black lace she’d supposedly bought—?!

“Pfft—kidding. Obviously you wouldn’t wear women’s lingerie.”

“O-of course not! Mean joke, Elsie... ahaha...”

I almost died.

That kind of like.

But as I laughed weakly, watching her amused grin—

...Did she really buy those?

I dug my nails into my palm.

Stop.

Walking beside her, Frauera’s words resurfaced:

“Elsie’s started noticing men.”

My chest tightened.

Her liking someone shouldn’t bother me.

If anything, I should be happy.

Elsie—who always undervalued herself—falling in love?

That’s... good.

So why—

Why did it hurt?

“...Yuri?”

Her voice snapped me back to reality.

"...Sorry. Got lost in thought."

"...Thinking about something else while I’m right here? How bold."

"...Ugh. My bad."

I scratched the back of my head, dodging her gaze. Elsie’s expression shifted—unexpectedly serious.

“Something bothering you?”

“Huh? Ah... not really?”

Could I even call this a problem? Should I tell her?

I didn’t know.

So I deflected.

But Elsie didn’t let it go.

“If something’s wrong, say it.”

Her voice was firm. Earnest. Worried for me.

...It made me happy. Embarrassed.

And painfully aware of how stupid my turmoil was.

I hesitated—then finally spoke.

“...Elsie. Do you... like anyone?”

Instant regret.

My heart hammered like a warning bell.

“Haah?”

“I-I mean, like, romantically? Or—”

Her glare sent my eyes darting away.

Why did I say that?!

Elsie sighed—half exasperated, half amused.

“Why would I owe you that answer?”

“...Sorry.”

I bowed my head.

A loud, dramatic sigh echoed above me.

Then—

“...So? Do you?”

“Eh?”

“You brought it up. Got a crush or something?”

Shit.

I’d backed myself into a corner.

“...W-well...”

“Well?”

Her stare wasn’t teasing anymore. It was sharp. Piercing.

Lying felt impossible.

“...Y-yeah.”

“...I see.”

Her reaction was... unreadable.

Not surprised. Not angry. Just—complicated.

“Elsie?”

“So you do like someone. Good for you.”

Her voice was flat. Neutral.

And somehow, that hurt more than if she’d laughed.

My chest tightened.

Why does she sound like that?

“...Who is it? Someone I know? Frauera?”

The tension from earlier had faded—replaced by something... resigned. Almost hollow.

I could’ve lied.

Should’ve lied.

But—

“The person I like is—”

“Is?”

Fear crawled up my throat.

This could ruin everything.

Yet—

“...E-Elsie... maybe?”

Pathetic.

I’d tacked on a coward’s escape route.

Elsie’s brow furrowed.

Then—she laughed.

“Pfft—As if. Like you and I would ever match.”

The words burned.

I forced a grin, nails digging into my palms.

“J-just kidding... haha, yeah.”

I want to disappear.

Elsie turned away with another sigh.

“...I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that.”

“...Thanks.”

My voice barely held.

When she finally looked back—

“...Find someone better for you. It’s not me.”

“...Huh?”

By the time I processed her words, she was already walking ahead.

I never saw her face.